Hip-Hip-Luray!!!!

You know how sometimes when you're driving along the freeway you see massive billboards for super-duper-uber-awesome tourist attractions that you will probably never visit? Like this one from outside Tucson, AZ, which creeps me out because someone once told me that "The Thing" is some sort of crustified body of unidentified phylogeny. I will never visit The Thing.

Ever since moving to Virginia, I've passed signs for Luray Caverns from time to time. It seemed like a safe bet that Luray Caverns were probably a cave rather than a mummified crusty body thing, so at least it had that in its favor. So last weekend involved a visit.

In a word: Amazing.

My only previous cave experience had been with Peppersauce Cave outside of Tucson, which involved belly-crawling 20 feet through a dark muddy hole in a mountainside in order to reach a dank slimy vaulted room. It was eery to be somewhere so dark and enclosed. A cool experience, but it convinced me I'm not a born spelunker. Alas.

In contrast, Luray is all lit and clean with a slick headphone-guided tour and some of the most surreal rock I've ever seen.

This set of drapery formations was at least 10 feet long. It grows about 1 inch per 100 years.

This is "Dream Lake," which is a perfectly still pool of water about 18 inches deep that reflects all the stalactites from the roof of the cavern and makes it look like there's a valley of stalagmites way down in a valley beneath you.

This cool beastie is a pipe organ that's hooked into a system of solenoids that trigger little rubber mallets to hit certain stalactites throughout the cavern. Each stalactite was specially selected for its musical pitch, so the notes you hit on the organ are actually what you hear back from the corresponding stalactite.

This pool of water is used as a wishing well. The copper from the pennies reacts with the water and turns the underwater stone that green tinge. Every year, they clean out the well and donate all the money to charity. For example, they've donated nearly $200,000 to the American Heart Association.

Dude. Luray Caverns is way better than The Thing could ever be.