It's dangerous being a stick figure these days

Remember back in the olden days when all you ever saw stick figures doing on signs was safely crossing the street while carrying a purse (or Man Bag, as the case may be)?

Those were innocent times. The only peril back then was the fact that they had no necks or feet.

Now, a mere walk around my neighborhood easily produces multiple signs depicting the stuff stick figures' nightmares are made of, including the Surprisingly Swift Gate Smash-o-Matic.

Not to mention Malevolent Parking Garage Entrance Barricade,

and Macabre Death By Angry Electric Cloud Monster.