By now, there has been a spread of awareness, acceptance, and support groups for a not-uncommon condition known as R.B.F. (For more information, see this public service announcement, or this educational video.)
While I'm fortunate to not suffer from that terrible affliction, with alarming frequency I'm reminded that I suffer from a less offensive but more insidious malady of the facial mimetic muscles: Resting Generic Face (R.G.F.)
On a regular basis, total strangers on the street wave at me enthusiastically
...only to do a double take when they get closer, then uncomfortably mumble apologies like "Sorry, I thought you were someone else."
Earlier this Spring, a small child spontaneously pointed out that I look like her American Girl Dolls. That's plural. I apparently look like all of them.
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| I assume it's because my elbows don't bend? Total resemblance. |
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| I'll take two of those tickets. I feel lucky. |
Mohawk?
While I hesitate to dissuade you from getting a mohawk (and, really, if you're gonna get a mohawk, it needs to be super-spiky and fluorescent), I think you're overlooking one distinct advantage of RGF. Namely, you are missing the opportunity to become a brazen criminal without ever needing to fabricate an alibi.
ReplyDelete"Your Honor, how could I have had time to rob that bank when I was so busy at the bar, grocery store, dry cleaner, church picnic, and American Girl Doll Impersonators Club?"